Read this, if you are feeling hopeless

Hey there,

I know it’s tough

I know it feels like no one gets you

I know how tight in the chest you’re feeling right now

How it feels like being non-existing would be the best solution for you

But know this,

You can go through this,

You will,

I know because I did,

Repeatedly

This feeling will come back,

That’s one thing I can assure you,

But it’s okay,

This is life as you and I know,

You are so strong that I cringed in jealousy looking at you,

Even though we never meet,

But that’s one other thing that I can assure you

So cry,

Cry all you want,

You deserve all the tears for all these times you’ve been holding on,

And then smile,

Smile because you went through the storms,

And just because,

You of all people deserve all the happiness in this world 

Resepi Tomyam Putih and Sotong Celup Tepung

Hi hi :)

I'll just skip my normal rants and straight away head to the recipe lah okay this time sebab iols kan student/businesswoman sekarang so busy lah sikettt hehehe

So here goes..

A. Resepi Tomyam Putih

Bahan-bahan:

Bawang putih x 4
Cili Padi x 10
Serai dititik
Halia 1 inci
Lengkuas 1 inci
Daun limau purut x 4
Limau nipis
Susu cair
Kiub pati ayam
sos cili

Cara-cara:

1. Tumis bawang putih, halia, lengkuas, serai, cili padi
2. Masukkan ayam dan sedikit air. Kacau sampai ayam masak
3. Masukkan garam,daun limau purut, susu cair 4 sudu, sos cili 1 sudu dan perah limau nipis.



B. Resepi Sotong Celup Tepung

1. Perap sotong dengan garam, kunyit, serbuk cili, serbuk kari.
2. Celup dalam telur, tepung yg campur serbuk penaik.
3. Goreng sampai keperangan.

Super duper easy kan? Bunyi macam susah tapi senang jeee :D

Resepi Buttermilk Chicken Simple

Hi hi.

It has been excruciating to find a free time to update this recipe and today, luckily I have finished most of my major assignments and bought all the ingredients for my Kelantan Style Lunch business which I have just started two weeks ago (and which perhaps I'll talk about in other post)

Most of my friends really like this Buttermilk chicken, tapi I biasa-biasa je, I learnt the recipe pon because my friends requested so here goes:

P/s: I always like the taste of spices, that's why my recipe is a bit different than others.

Bahan-bahan:

Daun kari 4 tangkai
Bawang putih 5 ulas
Cili padi 5
Marjerin 2 sudu
Ayam
Serbuk Kari
Serbuk cili

Cara-cara:

1. Hiris bawang putih, cili padi kecik-kecik macam gambar. Prepare bahan-bahan seperti gambar di bawah.

2. Perap ayam dengan garam,serbuk cili, serbuk kari, black pepper sikit for 1 hour macamtu. Then dip it inside telur, then guling-gulingkan dalam tepung ayam KFC tu.

 3. Goreng ayam sampai rangup. Angkat dan toskan.

4. Cairkan mentega dua sudu, then masukkan bawang putih, daun kari, cili padi. Tunggu sampai keperangan, pastu masukkan susu pekat 3 sudu, susu cair agak-agak nak kuah banyak mana, and tambah air sikit. Tambah garam untuk balance manis susu tu.

5. And then, dah siap dah! Senang je kannn? Dijamin sedap :3

My seram experience

Hi there.

Sooo, macam the title above, this entry is different from any other entry I've did before. Sebab i never have the courage to write about it kan

But here goes

I kept on listening to the sound of guli jatuh no matter whether it's during the broad daylight or midnight as in pukul 3 pagi macam tu.

Makin tegur, makin kuat kadang-kadang.

And then the sound of orang guna lesung tengah-tengah malam. At first macam bersangka baik la, yang rajin rumah atas ni malam-malam buat sambal.

Tak cukup dengan buat sambal, bunyi perabot digerakkan pon selalu dengar. Tengah malam pon bunyi. At first masa naif tu makin melambung la puji jiran atas ni, malam-malam pon sempat buat deco bersama eric lagi.

I was sooo silly kann haha. And then i started to feel curious and tweeted about it. The response was not what i wanted to hear and wasn't ready to hear

"Eh bunyi guli tu bukan maksudnya ada benda tu ke?"

"Nenek aku cakap kalau bunyi guli tu benda tu macam nak cakap dia ada"

And that was the last night i ever stayed up alone. Kalau ada yang terpaksa pon I would pasang ayat ruqyah kuat-kuat buat teman study.

Actually that wasn't the climax of the story. Recently, i had a nightmare when i was sleeping so terjaga la after that. I opened my eyes and i was pretty sure i saw something at the door. But i just read surah an-nas aloud and tido balik. Nasib baik tak kena tegur

Sooo, that's my seram experience that is still happening btw. Any of you guys experience this too? If so can you please share the experience and how you deal with it?

Resepi Tomyam Santan ala Thai dan telur dadar rangup

Sooo today, I am going to share another recipe that I have used the try and error method for so many times until I am finally satisfied with the taste which is....

Tomyam Santan alai thai, ala Noodle station

Why Noodle station? Well for starters, I started obsessing on how to make this tomyam after I ate the Tom yam noodle there because it was da bombbbb *insert amazed emoji*

I tried to replicate the taste for soooo many times but it never tasted the same until...

I watched Runningman. Yeah runningman yang ada Jong kook tu. It was the episode where they had the cooking competition and there was this part where Gary learnt how to make Tom Yam from a Thai chef. I remembered feeling sooo excited at that time to follow how the chef cooked it and finallyyyy after so many times altering the taste, i was able to make my tomyam to taste quite the same as the Noodle station's one.

Soooo nowww I am going to share the recipe that made me go crazy looking for it :D

Bahan-bahan:

Santan
Halia 1 inci
Serai 1 btg
Bawang putih 6 ulas*
Cili padi 7 *
Udang kering*
Ayam
Kiub pati ayam
Sos cili
Daun limau purut 5
Limau nipis 1
Carrot or any sayur you suka
Tomato
Perencah tomyam yang ada tulisan thai tuu

Cara-cara:

1. Blender bahan bertanda *
2. Masukkan santan separuh kotak , halia yang dihiris nipis, serai yang diketuk.
3.  Renehkan kejap, then masukkan bahan yang dah diblender dan perencah tomyam dua sudu.
4. Didihkan lama-lama (dalam 10-15 minit) sebab kita kan tak tumis, soooo kena la pastikan yang blender tu masak dan tak pedas yang panas tu
5.Masukkan garam, gula, kiub pati ayam, ajinomoto if you want.
6. Lepas tu masukkan ayam dan biarkan sampai ayam tu masak.
7. Masukkan air, daun limau purut, perah limau nipis, carrot. sos cili dalam 3 sudu besar.
8. Bila dah mendidih tu, masukkan tomato then boleh la tutup api.

Oh and alang alang dah share resepi tomyam, I share je la terus eh how to make telur dadar rangup macam orang thai buat.

The trick is actually to put tepung jagung setengah sudu teh tu and kacau telur vigorously. Vigorously sampai berbuih tau. Pastu minyak tu pastikan banyakkk. Andd minyak tu kena betul-betul panas. Bukan suam-suam kuku. Betul2 panas tauuu. Bila dah letak telur tu, slowkan api sebab takut hangit.

Andd that's it. For tomyam tu. you are definitely free to use prawn ke meat ke crab ke. It goes the same way anyway. Hope this helps!

Resepi Gulai Ayam kelantan

Hi guys.. I'm back with more recipes and cooking tricks! :D

Today is actually my only day off for this week since I am currently working part time every weekend of January. Luckily, it's still Thaipusam today so I can actually enjoy some free time to cook, do the laundry and also print my lecture notes. Not so free either actually but it's so much better than having to stand from 11am to 8pm during the weekend.

Anyway, let's cut to the chase and head to the recipe.

I am going to share the recipe of Gulai Ayam from my dear hometown which is Kelantan that is a must for all the kenduris and also other occasions.

So here goes:

Bahan-bahan:

Bawang merah 5 *
Bawang putih 2*
Halia besar ibu jari*
Daun kari 3 tangkai
Rempah ratus (kayu manis, pelaga, bunga lawang)
Santan
Cili kering blender
Rempah gulai ayam (gambar di bawah)
Asam jawa adabi

Gambar ni yang rempah daging sbb yang ayam dh habis. So if you ever go to Kelantan, make sure you buy this rempah banyak2 sebab serius sedap gila

Cara-cara:

1. Blender bahan bertanda *
2. Panaskan minyak, then masukkan daun kari, rempah ratus and bahan yang dah diblender tadi.
3. Masukkan cili kering blender 3 sudu, and rempah gulai. Tumis sampai pecah minyak.
4. Lepas dah pecah minyak, masukkan ayam. Renehkan dalam 15 minit bagi ayam tu rasa rempah tu semua. Tambah air sedikit kalau kering sangat.
5. Tambah garam, gula, asam jawa adabi, santan setengah kotak and air ikut banyak mana nak kuah tu.
6.  Didihkan kejap then dah siap, Kalau nak tambah potato pon bolehh.

Haa senang kan? Dalam setengah jam dah siappp.

Resepi ayam masak kurma simple gila

Hi tora tora kembali lagi :D

Since I have just started my sem 4, therefore the workload has not started yet hence the free time that I have to write another new recipe.

Today, I am going to give the recipe of one of my favorite dish of all time which is Ayam Masak Kurma. Hope this recipe is able to help all the bujang/married people out there that is having the I-Dont-Know-What-To-Cook-Today-Syndrome which I admittedly go through it too all the time :)))

So here goes,

P/s: This recipe is written in bahasa melayu because there are some ingredients that I dont know the english word for it and also bcs it is much easier to apprehend

Bahan-bahan:

Bawang merah kecik 5 ulas *
Bawang putih 3 ulas *
Halia besar ibu jari*
Serbuk kurma (brand papepon tak kisah)
Ayam
Potato
Santan
Rempah tumis (Kulit kayu manis, pelaga, bunga lawang)
Asam jawa adabi

Cara-cara:

1. Blender bahan bertanda * dan tumis sampai pecah minyak
2. Masukkan  rempah tumis dan serbuk kurma yang dah campur air sikit dan kacau sampai pecah minyak jugak sekali lagi
3. Masukkan ayam dan air sedikit sebab nak bagi rasa kurma tu meresap dalam ayam
4. Masukkan garam, gula, air asam jawa ( biasanya dlm setengah sudu je)
5. Masukkan potato yang potong ikut suka hati dan santan separuh kotak.
6. Didihkan sampai potato lembut

And voila! There you have it. The easy peasy ayam masak kurma that goes great with telur dadar and sambal belacan

Resepi nasi lemak style bujang

Hi  to anyone that stumbles upon this blog,

So, today i am going to give the recipe of how i usually cook my simple nasi lemak. I actually used to think that nasi lemak is complicated, until i learn how to do it and now it's actually one of the food i would cook when i feel lazy. I am actually doing this because some of my friends that used to stay in my house asked me to share some of the recipes i always cook everyday to give them ideas. I am actually a picky eater, so that's why I would cook something different and not what bujang people like me would usually prefer to cook everyday. But anyway, enough about me. Let's get started!

Here goes:

Bahan-bahan:
- Bawang merah kalau yang kecik tu 6 biji/ If yang besar tu satu pon dah cukup*
- Bawang putih 4 ulas*
- Halia *
- Daun pandan
- Cili kering blender*
-Udang kering*
- Ikan bilis
-Asam jawa adabi
- Cili padi 4 'ulas' eh? ke biji? ke tangkai? sorry bm dulu i tidur :P * (P/s: kalau tak suka pedas, tak letak ni pon takpe)

Cara-cara:

Untuk nasi lemak,
Biasanya sebab i guna beras cap rambutan, ratio yang i guna macam ni :

2 cup nasi = 1 cup santan= 2 1/2 cup air
+ Halia hiris nipis + daun pandan 2 helai

P/s: depends dekat beras yang korang guna jugak senanya. So pandai-pandai la agak eh

Untuk kuah dia pulak,

1. Blender bahan yang bertanda * and tambah secubit ikan bilis
2. Tumis seulas bawang merah yang dihiris nipis
3. Masukkan bahan yang blender
4. Tumis sampai pecah minyak (p/s: orang tua-tua cakap lagi lama tumis lagi sedap)
5. Tambah asam jawa setengah sudu or secukup rasa, garam, gula, serbuk cukup rasa sampai sambal tu cukup semua rasa
6. Tambah ikan bilis/sotong or pape lah yang korang nak sambalkan

P/s: Kepekatan tu depends la eh. Tambah la air if rasa pekat sangat


And... that's it! Senang je kan? So boleh la try bila-bila rasa nak makan nasi lemak malam-malam tanpa perlu g all the way to nasi lemak antarabangsa tu

My skeleton in my cupboard

First and foremost, this post is not intended to draw sympathy or anything, it is just what i feel so here goes

I have a lil bit of depression since i forgot when. 

Well maybe i remember, i guess it started after my mom passed away. 

It really has not been easy for me to admit this, even typing it made me feel disgusted with myself

Things has not been easy to me since then

Imagine being so sad that u're on the verge of hurting yourself but then you end up crying alone and feeling so empty

That you end up able to make yourself used to the fact that you need to wipe your own tears 

It gets overwhelming sometimes,

Imagine having a rubber band around your wrist, 

and imagine that it has been there for so long that you feel numb to the pain,

then imagine having to pull it out,

and that's how i feel once in a while when all the emotions come to me all at once begging me to feel them,

Every other day,

I'm actually this bubbly girl that can make jokes almost about anything with my friends,

but if only people know what happens inside the room, 

It has not been easy going through it,

let alone trying to make others understand about it, 

hence, this post

Since it's new year, i really really hope i can handle it better this year. So if there's any advice, I would really appreciate it . And i would appreciate it some more if the advices are not cynical or judgemental. Thank you in advance :)